Friday, September 25, 2009

Friday afty; girl just got paid…

1500 hrs: I’ve officially rendered myself useless for the remainder of the day…

Seriously, I’ve been trying all day to sit still at my desk and be productive-and failed miserably. And no, it has nothing to do with the caffeine.

Friday is my fave day of the week; no matter how stressful it gets, the anticipation for the weekend adds an extra spring to my step. Saturdays never live up (or down) to Friday’s expectations and come Sunday I’m sobering up to the harsh reality that is Monday.

But the most awesome Friday is the last Friday of the month (also known as pay day).

Now THAT is the stuff fantasies are made of. Right now, I’m feeling rich and its a beautiful feeling. Take this morning for example. I took a mat which ended up dropping me off one stage away from my usual stop. I had to walk the rest of the way arriving at the office 15 minutes later with feet looking like I had just trekked all over Damascus. And i did it with a smile on my face. Unbelievable, i know. And the smile changed to a mellowed out grin as i drudged through the e-mails in my office in-box without cursing or gesturing like crazy (now that i think about it, it would totally explain why my colleague was giving me a funny look, like i had taken some potent sippy sippys and i'm not talking about caffeinated kind)...

And now i'm about to finish my workday with such beautiful visions of lasagna, vodka, shopping sprees, disco lights in smoke filled rooms, choma, more vodka and yours truly being oh so deliciously up-to-no-good, I’m almost giddy. Sounds like the devil’s hot on my heels laughing himself silly. I know. And he is.

So me hearties, enjoy being fiiine, do some damage and here’s to Arthur!

Mob wendos,


PS: The Guinness ‘to Arthur’ Tv commercial is beautiful in its simplicity and the magic, l feel, lies in the way it aptly reminds us why beer is one of the coolest inventions ever

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Of terribly awful music videos

Being cooped up home on a Thursday ‘cause of the flu has me teed off for several reasons:

1. A day off work normally = a free day spent gallivanting in and around town. My spirit is willing but thy aching, flu-ravaged flesh is screaming no

2. Our local TV stations scrapped morning cartoons which = no apt entertainment to jumpstart my mind (Looney tunes, KND, Aladdin, Batman, Sponge bob & x-men; you’re still loved and greatly missed)

3. Last night I failed to arm myself with any rental movies= ill prepared to bum out. So I’m going through my DVD collection to see which TV show I can do a marathon re-run of without falling asleep…it’s a yummy tie between ‘Deadwood’, ‘Gossip girl’ and ‘how I met your mother’

So I flip through channels as I try to figure out which of the 03 shows will be just right and pause at Kiss TV; a channel I have been strategically avoiding since it first came on air. Don’t get me wrong, I wish them all the best. I really do, but playing music videos for 24 hours is my idea of bringing hell to the living room…which brings to my attention (again) something I’m eternally puzzling over: why are most hip hop vids so dreadful?

First off, there’s the appalling imagery; is there some commandment that states “Thou shall not shoot music vids without some almost naked ladies in it…lots of almost naked ladies…who have to act like they’re fawning over some guy, and the acting has to be really terrible?”

And oh, note how while the video ladies are in string bikinis or something similar (even without a water body in sight) the guys are in oversized clothes.

I go like “Aren’t those girls freezing?!”

Sometimes I wish they’d at least pretend to be drinking something nasty (say, like cham). Coz then I can nod in understanding & mumble “Ahhh, they’ve gone & drunk themselves silly. That totally explains why they lost their clothes!”

FYI, you’ll never see the men in Speedos and fleeting shots of bare chests (of the male persuasion that is) is the smuttiest video male models/dancers will ever get….and even such shots are rare.

Then some of the lyrics leave me genuinely stumped; I get it, you’ve made it. You’re rolling in the good stuff. But seriously, is it really necessary to belt out chest-thumping 03 minute songs solely dedicated to: the big house you own; the nice car (don’t forget to add an extra line swooning over the rims) and detailed accounts of trysts you’ve had with gorgeous women?!

Last time I checked affluence doesn’t scream for attention nor does a gentleman kiss and tell. It’s just down right tacky.

And oh, that crap about putting a cap in someone’s arse or physically assaulting someone is way too crazy for me to even try & wrap my logic around it…

I guess it shouldn’t bug me much (I simply switch channels as per kawa no?) except Kenyan teenagers look up to these guys so much, like they’re gods or something...and you’ll see these videos everywhere from pubs to mats. Come on guys, if what they sing is what they are all about, then we definitely can be way cooler than they are…They've got no imagination no?

Picture this;
if you bragged about your wealth like that in Kenya, you're begging thugs to happily help themselves to some of it. Shoot off your mouth about your one night stands & brawls or how you wekad someone ngeta and folks will just look at you like you’re an idiotic, juvenile sociopath at best…

On a bright note:
The upside to watching such bad videos is that it makes you appreciate the genuinely good ones.

Special mention goes to 02 songs whose videos and lyrics not only made me laugh but they had my attention:
Bongo la biashara –Jua Cali and a guy called Meja (that’s his name, yes?)
Niko poa- by ‘Meja’

I’m sure there are more good ones that I’ve not had the pleasure of viewing yet (feel free to recommend some).

Now back to my dilemma; will it be:

Oh so deliciously sexy Gossip girl OR Brilliantly lawless Deadwood OR the eternally funny Bernie & co?

Methinks ‘how I met your mother’ is what the Doc would’ve prescribed.

Mob wendos,